Richard's Online Journal
Modern Warfare: No Russian
Achievement Unlocked: Best Terrorist Ever
So, I finally played it. I’d have played it earlier, but my copy was on Steam, so it only unlocked at midnight this morning and I decided to go to bed instead of participating in a terrorist massacre. I know, lousy priorities, but I was sleepy.
I have no idea how I’d have reacted to it had I come in cold, since over the last week or so, it seems like my Twitter feed has consisted of nothing but people arguing the pros and cons of the whole thing, the leaked video, arguments about whether games should be touching this kind of stuff at all… I realised long ago that, like the (genuinely good) nuke section in the original Modern Warfare, all I was actually going to feel when I actually got it up on my screen was “Oh, it’s this bit.”
How did I feel? “Oh, it’s this bit.”
See? I know me too well.
Gameswipe
“Hello, I’m Charlie Brooker, and you’re watching Wipewipe, a show all about the shows of Charlie Brooker. And macram? for some reason.”
I’ll be honest, I’m a bit confused. I enjoyed the show, I like Charlie Brooker as much as the next cynic, but I’m not entirely sure who this special was aimed at. If you’re a gamer, you knew most of it already. If you’re not, Brooker’s mocking style (which is absolutely perfect if you’re a fan of the kind of thing being mocked, as with Screenwipe, Yahtzee, Noah Antwiler’s fantastic videos, and even stuff I don’t like much, like The Angry Video Game Nerd) isn’t exactly going to bring you round or teach you anything other than that you’re probably right about games being silly.
Why Games World instead of Time Commanders? Why GTA instead of Monkey Island? I’m not saying it shouldn’t have been cutting, that’s Brooker’s thing, but why wasn’t it cutting the idiots it kept showing clips of instead of reinforcing their prejudice through game choices? Why actively try to turn off the audience you presumably want to stick around for the full show by confirming their prejudices?
(In particular, I’m still trying to work out the logic behind spending much of the show complaining about TV only ever focusing on the negative, more violent games, then faking up a joke Wii title as a counterpoint instead of just… I don’t know… bringing out a copy of Animal Crossing. As it is, the message just became “We got nothing, sorry. Here’s some more boobs and explosions. Bullet to the cock!”)
The gags and guests were fun, but I’d rather have heard Graham Linehan rave about Left 4 Dead some more from a writer’s perspective than complain about Grand Theft Auto (even though I agree completely), or have had Dara O’Briain do a self-deprecating comedy bit instead of a rant. Again, it’d have been fine if it was actively for gamers, but it seemed seriously misplaced next to ‘let’s explain what Wolfenstein is’ level stuff.
If Gameswipe goes to a full series — and I’d really like to see Brooker do one, especially given the amazingly good stuff he did for PC Zone back in the day — I really hope it bites the bullet and just aims itself at gamers who want to watch a show about games. Bringing out Rab and Ryan from Consolevania, then stepping back to explain what generic genres are about? That’s like mixing matter and antimatter, only without exploding and blowing up the universe, for which I for one am frankly grateful.
Randomly, that CyberZone thing? It was even worse than the short clip on the show made it look. Unfortunately, it was so bad, even the interweb doesn’t have much of a record of it, but that’s okay. Just the intro bit says it all…
Terrifyingly (and yes, I know I’ve linked this before), this isn’t just not the worst game related TV show ever made, it’s not even the worst one fronted by Craig Charles. But the other is so bad, I can’t even bring myself to embed it. Click if you dare…
The Nameless Mod
“Is there anything in this city which does NOT have some secret complex in the basement?”
“I doubt it. Everyone here is a Deus Ex fan, remember.”
Before we go any further, let me say this: The Nameless Mod is one of the best mods I’ve ever played. No question. I can’t think of many that have impressed me more, and very few that I’d actually put on the same pedestal. I have some quibbles, but it’s a phenomenal achievement. Download it now if you own Deus Ex.
If you take only one thing from this rambling screed, take this: I enjoyed it about ten times more than Invisible War, and that’s not me damning it with faint praise. It took seven years for the team to make it, and believe me, it shows.
“My city. My forum. My god, this mod’s actually out?”
Fallout 3
After Ending Report: Except for one of the most staggeringly poorly thought out endings in the history of all things — I’d explain more, but I need to go finish that short story about a fish who was frightened of drowning — it’s good. The main plot is depressingly predictable, especially if you’ve wandered through these wastelands before, and many of the areas badly needed a smack with the design stick, but there’s so much cool stuff to experience, I doubt you’ll care. What’s missing is sadly what I expected — the breakdown of the different towns demonstrating I was doing more than standard RPG quest-bitch duties, and that any of my decisions mattered outside of their individual tasks. Right. Back to the past…
War. War never changes. Unless you count it changing from an isometric tactical RPG to a big AAA FPS hybrid from a different development team with a totally different design style. Then it does. Quite a lot, actually…