Alternative name: One Must Fall (It'll Probably Be You)
Hmm. Do I spot just a little GLaDOS in Chel’s design?
Briefly, I knew the fantasy of being good at fighting games. It came from owning Street Fighter II on the SNES and none of my friends owning Street Fighter II on the SNES. It worked out pretty well. While they stumbled around and mashed buttons, I expertly broke through their defences and controlled their zones and sometimes even managed to pull off a fireball, like, five times in a row! They were glorious days. Oh, the excitement when one of the console mags covermounted a little piece of plastic that you could put on the d-pad and actually have a chance of pulling off Zangief’s spinning piledriver. Those halcyon days before games like Mortal Kombat decided that instead of simple codes like quarter-circle-punch, fighting was best done by memorising codes like some palette-swapped Bletchley Park researcher. Why were some of them in bikinis? Dunno. History is weird.
But the golden age couldn’t last. Now, looking at something like Street Fighter IV, I’m immediately turned off by things like super this and hyper wotsits (named because they’re very, very cheesy indeed) and I just don’t think my brain has space for so many moves and plays right now. Enter Rising Thunder, which wants to make things easy, without making them… how to put this tactfully? Ah, yes. Shit. The alpha just opened up to everyone, so I thought I’d take a quick look and see if my hard-earned button mashing skills would finally be recognised.
Meet the English language tutor Frank Miller would have created.
Can we (myself and Mr. Matt Dillon) stop the villanous Middle Aged Harley Quinn before she wreaks revenge on the most deserving city since Sodom? Well, yes, probably. But not without some regret. Screw this place.
It’s a bit like Her Story… if her story involved making a million annoying censor bars. Join me and my special guest Resulka as we play through this ‘classic’ FMV shot alongside an erotic thriller you’ve never heard of. The rest is going up soon, but Patreons can watch the whole thing right now. Just log into the dashboard for the link.